After My Uncle Passed Away

To my Dad's Facebook account:

I finally got my laptop working but I don't have everyone's email addresses yet, so sorry if I sent this through Facebook.

Aunt Linda said Paul passed away in Hawaii, and I just wanted to let you know and wanted to convey my sympathies. I'm not sure how to feel right now, as I wasn't that close to him the last 10 years, but I still tear up a bit when I remember he was a sweet guy who let us use his house to stay in, and he picked me up at the airport once, and I really enjoyed his company and Laurel's when we visited or when we were kids he would come over and visit at Gramma's & Grampa's house during the holidays.

I guess Laurel is in Hawaii and has to figure out how to transport him back to Canada, but at least she has a good friend with her.

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That's always been interesting to me, that mom claims she never reads emails, yet today shortly after I sent this email, she called and said she was 'breaking her own rule' and calling me because there was a death in the family. Seems lately whenever I do send an email I get a phone call a few minutes later from her and, wow, what are the chances, it's JUST exactly the subject that was in the email I had just sent.

Strange that in the message she left on our answering machine she didn't mention WHO passed away. So if in fact I had not sent this message to her in the first place, I would hope she would at least have bothered to mention who in the family had passed away. Dad? Gramma? Chris? Seems like a mean way to try to entice someone to call them back. Sort of similar as her asking me to lie to Robin and tell him she had a raging case of cancer when clearly she did not, as she was still going to Florida and was using a cream to get rid of it. Also as barmy as when she told a renter of hers that she had cancer. My husband has had chunks of cancer on his back removed. Friends and relatives of ours have died of cancer. A sane person would not use cancer to manipulate people.

Then she said in the phone message to 'make sure I have had a good rest and done everything to take care of myself' before calling HER. Well, I am not sure why this has anything to do with HER. It's to do with Paul. It's to do with Dad  because he is Paul's brother. I sometimes shake my head at how much of an idiot she thinks I am. When she sent an email to me about what so-and-so said about construction, I know it is mom telling dad what to type, because dad isn't the type to be nosy and go around fishing for information to 'help' us with things we already have well in hand. Also I don't need to get mailed envelopes telling me I should get more exercise. Mom always did that, because she always has to be in control. She has to be right about everything, and she has to be listened to, or the world falls apart.

By the way, I believe it was me who said 'don't call us, we'll call you' not the other way around. And it was only because when calling that house or getting a call from their house, it's mom who takes over the conversation, and who controls everything. I'd like to talk to my dad once in a while, but apparently he's only there when my mother is not. Otherwise he just sits there listening to the conversation and letting whatever happens to come out of her mouth unfold.